My Candor?

I have been wondering if some of you think if my being honest is too much for some of you here? I don't get down right truthful to what I what I "really" want to say but apparently it bothers a choice few.
I am not a mean person and I don't mean to be if it seems like I am, but over the years...and I think my getting older has something to do with it, I have pretty much gotten the attitude that my sister has had most of her crazy life..."I'm gonna say what I think. You can take it any way you want or don't like the what I say or like the way I say it, not my problem."
I don't say things on purpose to hurt ones feelings or anything like that. Nor do I try to push my opinions on others as I don't like others doing that to me. There have been a lot of things I have wanted to voice my opinion about but I have to remind myself that this is a craft site therefore it's not appropriate so I keep it to myself or just vent it somewhere else. But there has been a couple of times where something I said and I feel needed to be said only to get a harsh response in return.
I'm a big girl. Tell me honestly if I should watch more closely to what I say, because I truly don't want to alienate anybody here.
But just remember, if someone says something to you and it's close to the truth and the truth hurts, hmm, something to think about so don't get mad at them.

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59 replies since 31st March 2010 • Last reply 31st March 2010

I don't really know you creativemind, but if you feel a certain way, you shouldnt sugercoat your feelings just for somebody else. You should speak your mind to a point, not a harsh one, but just how you feel. Most people don't like the honest truth, but we need more people to give it in this age.

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You didnt hurt my feelings in any way since Im on here,and I dont think being honest is rude.You should be honest.
And I read on other board posts or maybe on your profile that you like being honest and say what you think,so I already knew that If you ever say something that would hurt me I should over think what you said.because your just being honest and thats a good thing.
I hope you can understand what Im trying to say.I mean I wouldnt be hurt if you said something honest abouth me or my crafts because I would think abouth that in a positive way.

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Your honesty is part of who you are, if you end up trying to censor yourself all the time you'll make yourself miserable.
Personally I like your candour (U.K. spelling=]), it's nice to find somebody willing to give an honest opinion=)

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I'd never noticed you saying anything nasty. Just be honest. Things used to be a lot more heated on here, and me and Roma always got abuse for being too honest about stuff, so now I kinda stick to myself if I think anyone's being stupid.

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Psh, honestly, I think what you have to say is always great. I'm quite the honest person, too....

If they can't handle what you have to say, it's their problem. You always have a great, educated response, no matter the topic, and posting this here proves that you care. Don't let them bother you, honestly. Happy

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it's really hard on internet forums to know the real meaning of what someone is typing because there is no tone of voice, that's why i think so many post can be taken the wrong way. if i am in a negative mood and i read a "honest" post then I will take it in a negative way, even if that is not in spirit in which it was written- do you know what i mean??? sure i have noticed that your posts are a little more blunt then some other people, but it doesn't bother me. i don't think you are mean. you are just different then me as i like to take a more gentle approach to life in general. we shouldn't be tip toeing around each other because we don't want anyone to feel hurt but we shouldn't be stomping on other people's toes in the name of 'honesty" either. anyway... my two cents..... for what it's worth

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It really is a breath of fresh air when people are honest to you, sometimes people need that, because sugarcoating things is basically telling a considerate lie. I've never seen any of your opinions seeming harsh or anything. If people don't like it then the truth might be a bit too close to home, but people need that - even if they don't like to admit it. They'll go through life never being able to take critiscism...

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I agree with Lollykins. I need criticism all the time--doesn't mean I like it, but we all need it. :-D

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Thanks ladies and I know exactly what you mean Heather. When reading something, there is no tone so some can interpret what they read differently to how it was really meant. It doesn't bother me that people get upset with my honesty, only when it gets blown out of proportion especially when it's just a small comment or even one word or two then drama takes on a new meaning sometimes and it's ridiculous!
And I would never comment on someone's crafts in a negative way. Everyone has their likes and dislikes and to express your dislike for someone else' creation(s) just because you don't like it is just rude. Now I may give constructive criticism and only if it's asked for but other than that I always keep in mind that I will treat people the way I want to be treated.

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Thanks Rachie - call me Becky or Lolly (Lolly is the name of my cat - I'm kinda taking over it)
So Crreativemind, is there a specific critiscism that upset someone?

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Oh, there was this recent swap I was in and I made a somewhat harmless comment about the package I got. Not gonna get into much of the details about it cuz really it's not a big deal (at least not to me), but my issue wasn't about with the quantity but with the variety. The sender got upset.

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Well if thisis that persons first swap then they should be grateful of the advice because if it isn't their first swap then other people probably feel the same way about what they recieved but chose to say nothing. If they still have the arse with you then the only person its affecting is them with the constant re-living of the situation. It obviously doesn't affect you, so good on you.

I just hope that this person can step back and look at the comments you've made and learnt from it.

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Wow, i dont think I have ever seen you make a nasty comment! And if the person got upset then maybe they should step back and think about what they sent and maybe they would realize what point you were trying to get across!! I can't say that i have run into this with anyone but I would take a look at what i send and say to myself 'wow, that was kinda boring, crappy,etc.' The whole point with a swap (in my opinion) is to try and get to know the person and make things that they might enjoy too! But if you are going to get upset over constuctive critisism then maybe you shouldn't join swaps!
And besides if you cant be honest with someone you can't be honest with yourself!

Happy ok that was my 2 cents!

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It was their first swap and I don't know if their partner was really satisfied with what they got or was nice and just didn't say what they really thought I don't know. But if you don't tell the truth about something like that and they keep sending out crappy swaps (not to say that this person is) and then may get a partner that is let's say "not so nice" and really get their feelings hurt then it's safe to say it's our (previous swap partners) fault for not letting them know. Now who doesn't agree with that?

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