Stress

I am I high strung person. I have always been this way.

However, now I am dealing with a lot more BS than normal and my stress levels have hit the roof. Its really starting to effect me and my husband. (the problem isn't with my husband.) I think my cat is even starting to feel it...

I am working on trying to get myself out of this stressful situtation but it takes time.

Any ideas how I can relax?

I have found crafting helps but I can only do so much before I run out of ideas. Wine helps as well but I am trying to be careful with how much I drink.

Thanks in advance.

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10 replies since 19th November 2012 • Last reply 19th November 2012

You can try yoga, meditation, or deep breathing exercises. If that isn't your style, then find something you love to do. Craft to your favorite music, ride a bike, take a warm bath, or just chill.

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I love deep breathing exercises when I am about to explode. I took karate when I was a kid, like 8-15, and they had a exercise we'd do at the end of each lesson, about not using karate as a "weapon" but for self defense, and how you should use your brain to win fights instead of your fists, that kinda stuff. But then we practice breathing and meditation for 30 min, and I loved it. It really stuck with me over the years. I also used to do yoga when I had a gym membership, and loved the relaxing time at the end of the class too. When I'm stressed and at home I like to just go sit in a comfy chair or in my bed, away from everyone, with the lights off and just breath, chill out, and reflect. If I am stressed and out running around, like maybe waiting in line at the store and its just utter chaos that day, I try to tune out everyone and control my breathing, inhale slow for 7 seconds, hold it for 5, then slowly breath out for 7 seconds. Something like that Happy

Also just pretending to be happy works for me, like if I am stuck somewhere I don't want to be and I hate it but I cant leave, I just smile like I am happy, but on the in side I'm like FLM. I've noticed that works great around my hubby, because if I am acting like I'm OK and happy, he'll be ok and happy, then him being happy will rub off on to me and I'll actually start to be happy, weird I know. But it works a lot for me!

Sometimes you need to just treat yourself to something nice! If you're having a terrible week and you really need a pick-me-up, go buy something you like, and make a big deal about it. It doesn't have to be a big purchase. I'm always spending money wisely, because my hubby is the only one with a job, so I have to pick and choose when I can buy craft supplies and when I can ship swap stuff, and then when I can by new pants or whatever. So one thing I like to do that isn't expensive is to plan a day to go to the mall or stores. I'll tell my hubby which day we're going, its usually on the weekend. Then he knows were going and to be ready, less stress already because its planned Happy Anyway we'll get dressed nice, go to the mall and just walk around window shopping and cool stuff and I buy one thing under $20.00, it usually ends up being a book. Then we get a special snack, like ice cream or a big cookie from the bakery at the mall. So we end up only spending a few dollars, but we have fun and get to hand out together. Another option is we drive to the comic book store and I get to buy some books, which are only like $3 each, then we go get lunch at a nice burger joint or something. So again, we're spending a small amount of money and we get to hang out with each other and I get to buy something I love.

I think I am the master of Zen, lol. I was a very angry kid not like yell and scream and start fights, but I had a lot of internal anger and rage. I had to learn to deal with it so it wouldn't make me explode or become extremely depressed. I also used get really bad anxiety depression, that I didn't deal with well, and have been working on for the last 6-7 years, I am happy to say that I can usually regulate myself and my moods, so that I don't become depressed, and I think I live in a pretty stressful environment. Anyway, my hubby is in the military and we have a lot of crazy stuff happen to us, he leaves for training stuff at the last min, he's been to Iraq once and almost had to go to Afghanistan, we've moved across the country 2 times and are doing it again in December. So I get a lot of practice to control my stress, LOL. But when I control my stress levels or deal with my stress so it doesn't build up I totally see it rub off on to my hubby, he is less stressed and more helpful if I am less stressed.

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I've always had bad anxiety since I was a kid. What helps is chamomile tea, and lots of it. Hot baths are nice as well.

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I used to take walks but that didn't always work depending on the town I lived in. Does exercise calm your mind? I also used to write my feelings in a free flowing sort of way. If you can, I recommend following some of the exercises in the book,"The Artist's Way". www.theartistsway.com Screaming into pillows doesn't really work for me but screaming can get some stress out and pillow makes it not so bad for others.

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Treat yourself, run yourself a bubble bath with relaxing aromatherapy oils and candles and just relax.

I also get stressed a lot and I have found that doing anything that brings back good memories works. For example, I am busy reading all the Harry Potter books again because I always loved them when I was young. These days you'll find me the happiest if I have my HP book in my hand.

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Reading is great, too!

Sometimes when I'm too flustered to do anything else, I'll pick up the nearest scifi or fantasy novel and get nose-deep into it. Escaping into another world for a while always dumps stress well.

Books + Baths + Tea!

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Wonderful suggestions all. Thank you!!

Pam - how did you become the master of zen? Happy How did you learn to regulate your mood? I think I holding in a lot of anger and sadness and its coming out in ways I don't realize. (but others see it.) My main coping mechanism is to withdraw. This has caused problems recently. Although if I feel like if I expressed myself, I would get into even more trouble. No win right now.

I think its time to get a new book and chamomile tea Happy

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I have aspergers syndrome, which makes me Very stressed & have bad social anxiety, which is all followed by depression. lol So i know the worst of how it is. Heres things i do:

1. Absolutely DO THINGS U LOVE.... I craft, listen & sing along to music, watch a good happy movie (for some reason old movies cheer me up), read.
2. Talk/hang out with someone who loves you... I text or chat online with friends when im feelin bad. But getting away from the stress/situation & hanging out with a good friend is the best! You can let it all out, talk about it, & then do something fun.
3. (If u dont have someone to talk about it to) Start journaling. ...i used to write poetry when i was in high school to relieve thoughts & stress. Some people also find helpful, just writing down things u love about your life & are thankful for.
4. Surround yourself with things u love... Whether it be pictures, things. Make an inspiration/happy board? Try to make a safe-haven for yourself somewhere to chill & feel good.
5. Studies have found that exercise helps a lot. Never tried it myself tho. Tongue
6. Taking a long hot bath helps calm me down. And sleeping it off.
7. Do something fun or new ...go to a movie or to a museum. Or join a hobby group somewhere.
8. Sometimes you gotta pig out! lol not really healthy, but you will feel better eating all the foods you like.
9. Redecorate a room ...sounds stupid, but my house stresses me out. So when i re-did my room, i felt better. Gives you something new & good to look at.

I have to hide a lot of my emotions, & keep it all in as well. Its not healthy, but sometimes its better just to keep my mouth shut. lol (Well it is in my house bc im the opposite of everyone else here). But these things have helped me get over smaller stress/depression ...talking to someone about it is the best remedy tho. And leaving the environment & doing something good. Hope that helps.

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Thanks DarkAshHurt! They are very useful suggestions!

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I would like to share with you what my PD teacher shared with me... The Ten Commandments of Reducing Stress! Happy Hopefully they will help you like they've helped me!

1. Thou shalt NOT be perfect, nor even try to be.

2. Thou shalt NOT try to be all things to all people.

3. Thou shalt leave things undone that ought to be done.

4. Thou shalt NOT spread thyself too thin.

5. Thou shalt learn to say 'No'.

6. Thou shalt schedule time for thyself, and thy supportive network.

7. Thou shalt switch off and do nothing regularly.

8. Thou shalt be boring, untidy, inelegant and unattractive at times.

9. Thou shalt NOT even feel guilty!

10. Especially, thou shalt NOT be thine own worst enemy, but be thy best friend.

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