I'm getting a car D:

Yea, so apperently my parents are buying me a car soon.
Now...I have a huge fear of driving (when I think about having to drive, I start to have these little anexity attacks and can't breathe well), but I NEED to get a car so I can get out of the house (things can get a little around here sometimes and it'd be good for me, like, emotionally, ya know?).
I don't know how to react when my parents actually give me the car.

I know a simple "Thank you" will be good enough for my mom (we're closer and she understands my personality), but I know that won't be for my dad Happy
If I'm not "ZOMG! U GOTTED MEH A CAR?1?!?! THX U THX U THX UUUUUUUUUUUU **kisses feet**OMGEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!A CAR! A REALZ CAR!!! 4 MEEEEEEE" then I think he'll think I don't care or something. I mean, it's not that I DON'T want it and I am greatful for it (I really need to get a job so a car would kinda sorta really help lol) but I just don't know what to tell my dad or how to thank him :/
When it comes to gifts, I'm just not the type of person to really...like, vomit out of sheer joy and happiness when I'm excited lol
I'm pretty "Happy Of thank you. That's so sweet."
I'm kinda casual, I guess??

I just know that my friends, when they got their first car, they were freaking out and yelling and running around all excited then they grabbed the keys to go show it off.
And I know with me, I'd just say thank you and then...nothing lol

Happy
Blah...I don't know what to dooooooooooo...
(Rant over lol)

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14 replies since 27th July 2010 • Last reply 27th July 2010

Sometimes the best way to thank someone is to just put it to good use. Offer your dad a ride somewhere and then while your driving tell him how helpful the car is and what you like about it. If you take the time to put in why your thankful it makes it feel less rushed and it makes the person feel like they really helped you.
And I think your reaction is totally appropriate, a thank you says it all you know? And I don't think your dad is going to be mad, if your mom understands she can show your father that you really are grateful if you need the help. :3

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Well...I think that'd be a beautiful thing to be able to do, honestly, but I can't talk with my dad.
We have TERRIBLE communication and it's hard for us to understand each other, ya know? :/

And whenever my dad goes somewhere, he HAS to be the diver. There's no other way to go about it.

And honestly, a thank you isn't always good enough for him Happy
Espically with a car, it won't be...

And my mom, bless her heart, she won't be able to tell him either.
It's just something he doesn't understand, ya know?

I mean, I know it all sounds so crazy, but that's really what it's like (I think pretty much my whole family is crazy but I generally like them, so it's fine lol).

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My dad is a bit like yours, so I definitely see where your coming from. Though we are both very hot headed so we're much harder to handle together. But if you can stand your ground and not get angry when he doesn't get what your saying that's going to make it easier, and he'll probably back down a bit. I suppose you just have to say it and if it's not enough for him then honestly at some point it doesn't matter. He's not supposed to do it so he can be praised, it's for you and if that's lost in translation for him then I'd say he doesn't really deserve your thank you, though that sounds harsh.
In the end your mom gets it and she's half of the equation and she seems to be making more of an effort then him so I think she's going to understand and be happy enough to make up for your father. 50% isn't so bad when it's between two, you know? I don't think you should change because he can't lighten up, just give it you best and if he's not happy that's actually his problem.

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That's the whole terrible thing: He doesn't back down, no matter what.
I've tried to calmly stand my ground, and it just makes him even more stubborn.
I just really hope my thank you is good enough.
I know what it's like to not feel apperciated, and I know it's a crappy feeling :/

I think, when it all boils down to is the fact that I'm such a...weird child lol
In my area, I'd be considered weird XD
I'm from Florida and the area I live in is a very consertive area that's all about sports. That's kinda how most of my family is.
I'm a liberal (I think the only one in my family) artsy kinda gal who doesn't care much for sports and what most other people do around here. He knows I'm different, but he's not used to it.
I think he just doesn't understand me, and doesn't really know how to handle me.
And like with a lot of people, it freaks him out.

I just really hope when the time comes, he just knows that when I say thank you, I actually mean it and doesn't rag on me about it :/

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That's the whole terrible thing: He doesn't back down, no matter what.
I've tried to calmly stand my ground, and it just makes him even more stubborn.
I just really hope my thank you is good enough.
I know what it's like to not feel apperciated, and I know it's a crappy feeling :/

I think, when it all boils down to is the fact that I'm such a...weird child lol
In my area, I'd be considered weird XD
I'm from Florida and the area I live in is a very consertive area that's all about sports. That's kinda how most of my family is.
I'm a liberal (I think the only one in my family) artsy kinda gal who doesn't care much for sports and what most other people do around here. He knows I'm different, but he's not used to it.
I think he just doesn't understand me, and doesn't really know how to handle me.
And like with a lot of people, it freaks him out.

I just really hope when the time comes, he just knows that when I say thank you, I actually mean it and doesn't rag on me about it :/

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I got really scared when I first started driving after 7 years of just using a bus

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I have never liked driving--or even owned a lisence. I am 23 years old, almost 24. Thankfully, I live in an area where I can walk or bus it to pretty much everywhere.

Are you and your dad able to talk about anything? Maybe you could mention to him that you are happy you have a car because it will be so much easier to get a job, and that was one thing that was really holding you back. The trick to expressing thanks or complimenting someone is to pick one thing you really, honestly like, and then elaborate on it.

For example, what I said about the car, or when your friend is wearing a heinous outfit for prom and asks if you like it, you can say that you love the way the color accentuates her eyes, or something.... :-P

Hope I helped! :-D

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michelle G.
Goodness me, I don't even seen how anyone drives those beasts o_o
I would never...I could never...
I'm so little and I can hardly see over the hood of the Yukon I'm having to learn in XD lol


*Rachie Pin-Up*
That's how it was for my sister-in-law.
She lived up in New York, so until she came down here to marry my brother, she never needed one.

Like...I know with my dad, I sound really whiny and like I don't even wanna try, but it's like...talking to him feels awkard sometimes XD lol
It's not that every time we talk, it's an agrument or anything. No, not at all.
And we CAN talk.
But sometimes it's like....I don't know...talking is weird XD
Because we're not really close and we're so different and I don't think we know HOW to talk to each other, ya know what I mean?

I mean...I could try to wiggle that in somewhere :o

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Just make eye contact, and say...Thank for loving me dad. I really appreciate all you do for me.

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I know what you mean being from florida. The south has its ways and if you dont live that way people view you as weird. Have you considered giving your dad a thank you card with a long note from you. maybe leaving it in his vehicle so he will see it before work or something. its another way of communication that seems less confrontational but shows you went out of your way to show you appricate him.

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How did it go?

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Maybe your dad does understand and thought the best way to over-come your fear is to get you a car? Flooding is a very common technique in combatting someone's fears and phobia's.

I'm sure that - maybe if he see's you trying but you still can't get on with it - he will understand because you still tried?

I don't mind driving, I didn't have THAT much confidence in driving. I think once I've got more confidence in driving it'll be better. Having and affording a car will make things a hell of a lot easier for me. I have a provisional license and when I've got a secure job I think I shall take iup my lessons again!!

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I'm scared of driving too, and never seemed interested in it when i was around 16. So my parents stopped caring about getting me a car overtime.

Now i need one so bad i cant stand it (im 21). Im still petrified of driving, but now i feel like i made a huge mistake by not going along with it. And potentually getting over my fear. Now my younger 16yrold brother has a car & has more freedom then i do. Happy And no one takes me anywhere.

Take them up on it, u dont know how lucky u are. Youll probably overcome ur fear. Youll be happy about it later.

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DarkAsHurts: My story pretty much parallel's yours, I started lessons when I was 18 (my dad got them for my 18th birthday) and I took it up for about 15 lessons. I was working part time alongisde Uni at the time and my Granddad was selling his car, I was going to buy it off him but I was unhappy with the job so it was job or car. I wish now I had bought it off him as I'm also 21 and lack in freedom... plus it would be an extra something to remind me of my granddad (he died 6 months ago) Happy

Although it's hard to say be lucky and grateful to Erica because it's something that frightens her. It's like someone afraid of spiders saying be grateful for your pet taranchula. I know it's not the same exactly but it seems to be a phobia for Erica.

Although I wouldn't mind someone buying me a car if I was honest Tongue

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