Friendship Problems

what, she just got al her stuff and wnt away? without telling you? wow that must have been really hard for you! I totaly understat that you ware mad, i would me to. but also ut's really goot that you accept her apologize, so i hope for you you get your friend back!

whaat
she just bailed on you? wow. what did she do that for. real nice, not telling you. no wonder you were mad. i would've been real mad, too.
and accepting the apology is good. i hope you'll be friends with her again^^

When she apologized, she didn't give an explanation why, and I don't expect her to because she's never been one who openly shares her feelings. For a few years I just started thinking that maybe she had died. It was almost easier to try and accept she was dead than that she had bailed on me. I know we'll never be close again like we were, but friendship is still possible. Thanks, Caity and Suzi!

no problem. i really wish you guys het to be friends again. and i can imagine thinking she's died rather than bailed on you was almost easier...it makkes it less like she rejected you, like oyu weren't good enough. i'm very happy my friends probably won't do that.

My very best friend of ten years "dumped" me too withiut explanation, when I had my first baby. I was in hospital for 3 months with pre eclampsia, and she said at first she couldn't visit me because she had a phobia about going into hospitals, since her Dad had died in hospital. Then when my daughter was born, she didn't want to know and wouldn't even visit me when we got home. At first I was very upset, but it was because she had found out she couldn't have children, and couldn't bear to see me with one. I did get over it, by realising it was her problem, not mine. And I have enough problems of my own without taking on other peoples.
I am sorry she didn't feel able to talk it through with me, and remain friends, but I suppose that's just how things are. We both moved on, and of course when you have children you make lots of new friends through them, friends that are willing to share your problems, hopes and fears.

I'm sorry, Nora. I can see your situation from both sides; having lost a friend unexplicably and because I most likely can't have children because of two ectopic pregnancies I had, one causing me to lose half my reproductive system. It was very difficult for me to go to the OB/GYN for follow ups after my surgery and see all the happy pregnant women. I'd often break down in the waiting area. But a few weeks after my surgery, my best friend who was pregnant got violently ill and was admitted to the hospital. She had moved back to her parents' house 2 hours away near the end of her pregnancy, but would drive back to my city for her check-ups because she liked her doctor so much. She would often come alone. So I got a surprise call one night from her. She was all alone in the hospital and her family couldn't come until the next day. She asked if I could bring her a toothbrush and toothpaste. I didn't even hesitate. I went to Walgreens and straight to the hospital. This was my best friend, and even though I was devastated about my own loss; I was so excited about the arrival of her daughter and also concerned about her being so ill. She gave birth 3 days after 9/11 and I went and visited her and the baby and I was excited and happy for her. People just handle things in their own ways I guess. I'm glad you have a lot of new friends who you're close to now. I was able to get over my fear about not having children for two reasons: I worked in the foster care system, so I know now that if I'm ever ready for motherhood there are tons of children who need love and don't have it; and my niece was born and she showed me how tough being a parent can be (she's a little demon, but I love her)! I hope your former friend can get over that issue as well because it's very difficult to deal with.

Oh, Kiddo, I'm so sorry to hear about your ectopic pregnancies...what a harrowing experience that must have been for you.
I understand why my friend did what she did, and I forgive her in my heart. I'm just sorry she couldn't confide in me, we could have had a good cry together and maybe come to terms with it. She was obviously hurting badly, but she did hurt me too. Sometimes I think I should have kept trying to get in touch with her, but as time passes that becomes harder to do, and now we have well and truly gone our seperate ways.

Thanks, Nora. They were bad experiences, but made me stronger in the long run. I'm thankful that I was glad to be able to come to terms with everything, cause Lord knows I have enough other problems to deal with right now! That's good that you are able to forgive her in your heart. I'm really easy to forgive other people (well not all, there are a select 2 or 3 I have unresolved issues with), but I don't know if I do it more for the other person, or myself. I hate the feeling of holding a grudge, so maybe I forgive so easily to give myself peace. I don't know why I went off on that tangent. I know how bad it hurts for someone you love to be going through something rough and they don't allow you to help or even tell you about their problems. I almost feel betrayed in a way because they were so untrusting of me that instead they chose to keep a huge secret or confide in me. I'm truly glad you have lots of good friends now. Especially the supportive kind that you can share everything with. You're very lucky =D