Wedding Gift

like a card? otherwise i wouldn't bother as there's shower and wedding gifts to make/buy.

I wouldn't bother with sending her a gift with an RSVP. Attending a wedding is costly enough with added gifts to it.

According to proper etiquette a gift isn't necessary, you can always make the wedding gift more personal.
If you really want to give her a token what about a box of calming herbal tea? You could even blend your own tea if you have access to a herb shop. Peppermint, Spearmint, chamomile, hops, lemonbalm, and vanilla are all very calming herbs.

If you really want to make her something, try something small and simple like a bracelet or a curio she can keep with her.

I agree with Monika, maybe a simple bracelet or charm attached to the card as part of the card that can be taken off as a little momento.

u dont send a gift with the rsvp- get a personal gift for her for the actual wedding- and then u give a gift at thebaby shower

haha @ Sadey I think you mean bridal shower!

the baby shower will follow soon enough...

Well for the weddign they have asked everyone to give them money for the honey moon which im not a huge fan of I would ratehr give a gift then money. But I think I will follow the advice you have all given me and just give her the money at the wedding.

If you would really prefer to give a gift, why not create something for the honeymoon? You could always give it in conjunction with a cash gift.
If you sew, you could make her a pretty silk nightdress or if you're more of a papercrafter, you could make a special honeymoon album with spaces for photos & momentoes from their trip. You could always add a little pocket to it, to hold a cash gift and add a little note saying something like "Use this to enjoy a bottle of bubbly on the beach at sunset" or if you know where they are heading you could say its for a visit to somewhere in the locale.
That way, both parties are happy! You get to give (and they get to receive!) a gift that you've put some thought and love into, plus they have some extra cash to do something fun with. Ultimately, it doesn't really matter if they use the cash for what you suggested, it's enough to know that they know you were thinking about them ;D lol
Other ideas would be a basket with personalised mugs, some really decadent hot chocolate and matching bride & groom cosy knitted socks for a ski holiday. Or a beach bag with decorated flipflops and a little wallet containing currency for their destination...
I'm getting carried away! I'm sure you get the idea.......

Thank you Bindibabe for your lovely and thoughtful ideas

I have to agree with you, I'm never 100% happy with the idea of "just give us money" - it feels a bit impersonal! But I can understand the thinking behind it, I mean if its a couple who have lived together for a while, they've got all the usual wedding list pressies already!
I usually try to sneak a little gift into the proceedings. lol

Also, depending on how organised she is, you could offer to hand craft some part of the wedding as your gift. Table decorations or favours are always nicer if they are made in such a way that they reflect the wedding couple.

My sister got married in May, and as they had been together forever, they put a little poem in their invites saying that they didnt really want gifts but if guests really wanted to they could make a donation to charity, or make a donation to a honeymoon fund. Plus family and close friends donated "bits" of the wedding as their gifts. I made the cake, another sister made the dress, she has a friend who is a beautician so her gift was hair/makeup/spray tan, someone else is a caterer so they gifted the evening buffet. Of course, most of those plans will probably be well underway if the wedding is at the invitations going out stage, but it's an idea for next time!!!

Please keep us posted on what you decide