Clean verses not clean

I live with my youngest daughter and her teen children.Every thing is fine except I hate dirty , I dont mean messy , I can handle that, but they are dirty, I cant stand it, but I cant keep it up all by my slef.I cry and try to do it , but I cant do it all.We both has many dogs, she would keep hers cleaned up.I have to leave some how and go some where.I cant take it , just dont know where to go..or how..

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7 replies since 6th May 2011 • Last reply 6th May 2011

Could you create a chore chart with what has to be done each day and week so that everyone can see what needs done? Perhaps that would save you from having to move.

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I would love to, but no one listens to me.Im just here, they even ignore me complety, if I say somethig to my daughter she says I need help from a doctor.Im shaking my head, just ranting.no one to talk to ..sigh.

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I hate messiness myself, but i have personal experience (myself) when someone older than me other than my parents telling me anything and most teenagers will NOT listen. Try not to rant to your daughter it is probably just pushing her away. I would suggest picking up/ cleaning ever so often when they are not looking or bothering. Since your just kinda "there" dont try to push it a lot just try and clean ever so often. I wish you luck with the messiness.

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I'd kick her out, if it's your house. If not, there's got to be something you can do to get your own place that suits you and your pets.

I don't mind messy... it gives me something to organize, maybe a round with a vaccuum and it's done... but unchanging dirt is intolerable.

Make her watch some Confessions: Animal Hoarding or another show like Hoarders or Hoarding: Buried Alive. That might get through to her.

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If I do any house work at all they all complete quit.STOP right there.I got sick for the last 2 weeks, I had been keeping up the house, cleaning the carpets and such.Im 64 and I get tired easily.
They are all young, my daughter is 34.Im hoping I can move into with my sister.She is looking for a bigger place with 5 bedrooms with sliding glass doors to 2 bedrooms..and I will have my own doggie yard, just will be some time before it happens, she has to save up the money to move.I will just take some puppy money and my ck and go.I cant stand filthy, messy is ok.my desk if a mess, I work off of it all the time..I have just been so upset that while I was sick no one did any thing.No mopping no vacuming, no nothing, I cant take that, I have to know if I get sick they will help take care of things, I only ask my daughter to get the kids to help, I dont ask the kids to do any thing, except something very tiny, they may be able to do that..I have no one to talk to so I just had to rant..it was driving me crazy not being able to talk about it.I cant live on my own , not enough money.I have a small ss ck and small outside income..If I could live by my self I would never have moved in with her 3 years, ago.It really , really made me sick that things got so bad I had to move in with her.I love my daughter, but she has no consideration for me.If she could work me like a horse that is ok with her, or if I can stand the mess that is ok with her..Thank you all for bing so supportive, I needed it.And I am talking to my sister and trying to work something out as soon as she can do it.I just pray it works out, shes a clean freak, Im not that , but I can handly it..lol..lol.Better than not cleaning at all..
thank you so much

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I couldn't imagine being 34 with a kid and not cleaning at all!
My fiance's mother is your age, and I do everything I can to help her keep the house clean when I'm up at night since she spends all day outside keeping up the garden and keeping the yard nice.

Sometimes my fiance gets overwhelmed with how much his mom asks him to do when we're staying with her each weekend, but he still gets it done.

Your daughter sounds pretty disrespectful... but when you move in with your sister, I'm sure your daughter will miss the cleanliness you contributed to her living space.

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Maybe if you went away for a couple of weeks they would realize how much of a difference there is when you're not there to pick up after them.

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